This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
