if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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