Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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