So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize