your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
