i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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