yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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