that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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