i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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