That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
