his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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