you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
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Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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