My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
