i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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