this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Can you bring me the toilet please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize