just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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