i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
