frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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