So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
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