lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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