So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
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before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
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That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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