My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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