ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
