do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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