I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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