i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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