i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
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Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
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I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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