the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
