that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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