I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.