I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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