The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
