I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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