Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
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