I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i was born a porn star she said
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
