I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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