id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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