so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
