Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
