I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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