Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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