check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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