Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
