it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
we're so committed to being not committed
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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