I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
