Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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