Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
