ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
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apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
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I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.