ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize