talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
